happy birthday

Birthday Wishes

And I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of your life

Because I haven't posted publicly in so long, some of you may have missed the memo that I am in love with the man of my dreams. Pretty cool, huh? Even better, we're in love! Today is his Birthday, and he's on a work trip, many miles hence. I figured I'd go with a sneaky, roundabout form of wishing him a happy one, and I thought some of you might enjoy it too.

This is one gift I can always give my man from a distance: Words. It is a gift I treasure and know that he treasures as well. Just another paragraph or two to add to our story:

Years ago, a miracle was growing - one God planned before the creation of the world. My love tells me that I attract miracles, and truly it must be so. The most amazing miracle I've ever known is in love with me, and not only the kind of love based on nice fuzzy feelings and attraction on their own, but a deep love that lasts and creates a team to take on life. Just like a mother watches and feels a baby growing inside her, I've spent my life in a pregnant expectancy, waiting for this man, one who could redeem my past and show me a beautiful, miraculous future. What we have together is beautiful, an excellent fulfillment of both our dreams and desires for the present and the future. Everything we've ever wanted. Even when times are hard and we have to weather hardships together, we don't have to go it alone anymore.

But that's not why I love him. I don't love my man because he fulfills my dreams - a life built on that would fail. I don't love him for his black, curly, silky hair. I don't love him for the way he makes me feel when I see desire slow-dancing in his eyes. I don't love him because he reads to me with perfect accents, swoops forward to open doors, takes me out to plays and plans with relish to take me dancing.  I don't love him for the moments when I look into his eyes and all the love songs I've ever heard wash through me, a line at a time, and I find the truth in them staggers me. I love all of these things, and they brighten life, but they are incidental, the icing on a cake, the gravy on a full meal.

 I love him because he wants to live Life with a capital L. I love him because I see God deep inside him and behind his motivations. I love him because we are healed in each other's presence. I love him because I've seen exactly who he is, understood another person and been understood, and I love him because I respect him deeply. He is truly a man worthy of my love and devotion, and I am confident of this. To be with him is freedom - to be with another soul whose depth and passion and vibrance match so closely with mine.

You saved my life from a colorless one
From a colorless past you asked me to the paint store


I love you, sweetheart, which you well know. Happy Birthday.