a hero can save us

Sunny Saturday Post

You put me back together
In the perfect fashion
Just watch my heart's reaction

What is happening in my life? I haven't posted a general post in a long time because I've been busy and when I do finally write it's so long that there's got to be something in it I don't want the world to know. I also feel as though I have gone back to my former state as a storehouse for secrets. After my show in March I felt like I'd done some housecleaning, but amazingly enough three months later I am again fully stocked with secrets and treasures. I always identified with the Biblical passage about Mary: "She stored up all these things in her heart." The bookshelves in my heart are glittering with treasures and secrets from so many people. I am very grateful to be trusted by so many, but with great power comes great responsibility as they say. My public and private lives are both so rich at the moment... And my spiritual life. I'm embarking on some spiritual journeys this summer that I am excited about - a pursuit of the truth. As my life theme song says, I'm starving for it.

As far as my physical life is concerned, I am settling into living on my own again, actually enjoying spurts of doing housework just because it's my own space, regardless of it being borrowed. I entertained seven friends my second night here with a candle-lit supper that I'd cooked with just a little bit of reference to a cookbook. People seemed to enjoy it, so apparently cooking is one of my favoured artistic mediums as well. Got that from gene from my Mom's side, that's for sure.

I am having a very busy week. Lots of things to do. I went to a bridal shower yesterday, which was fun even though I normally avoid that sort of thing like the plague - as if being feminine was a disease that wasn't hereditary. I am becoming more able to participate in women's events without feeling like I don't belong there. It's a good opportunity for people watching at the very least, and I met some really lovely women last night. My fear of women-centric events is subsiding, to my great relief.

Of course last night's bridal shower included me talking to a couple of boys in Grade 4 and 5 respectively about the different kinds of rockets you could make and being allowed to hold their pet tarantula, which was a really beautiful experience. Such an amazing creature. I have no fear of it, I just found it so beautiful. It was warm to hold, too, which I should have known because of the climate they come from. So tentative in its movements, so careful and yet content. I can learn from that. Anyway, spiders are one of the many things I am not the least bit afraid of that so many people are. Including heights and flying and small spaces and the dark. Of course, those are just the physical fears. Emotionally I have similar makeup to the rest of us screwups, except I'm not really afraid of what people will think of me - the general consensus is that people like me, and those who don't have their reasons which are more about them than me, and anyway, none of their ideas of my can be worse than my own self-condemnation has been.

I've started my new job, but for the moment I'm working from home, which is nice and I'm enjoying playing my music. I really, really despise the new U2 album, unfortunately. I don't think there's even one song I like. Of course all the other albums I've been introduced to lately are going over very well.

I am working at a very impressive spreadsheet for work, and I discovered an awesome website called MyTextTools. It's actually a great resource for me, saving me many hours of typing things. Gotta love the internet, there's generators for so many things. If you can think it, chances are excellent someone else might have built it by now. I was generating codes and taking spaces and duplicates out, which was very useful.

I've lately been listening to two albums constantly, Anberlin's Never Take Friendship Personal and Mute Math's self-titled album. I absolutely adore both of them, they're great alternative albums and perfect for the spring that is coming up around me. I am loving (and getting into) the sunlight. My new cell phone sticker came today - it's Calvin and Hobbes on a hillside, the summer icon I've been using... I took my bike out to put air in the tires yesterday, which was a hard ride out and an easy ride back. I'd forgotten just how much freedom I feel on my bike. I'm going to ensure that I get to ride it quite a bit this summer. In conclusion, summer is awesome.

I have grand plans, after this busy streak is over, to pick up a few books and my guitar. Tomorrow morning I want to do some paid work and then take the afternoon entirely off. Then I'll take Monday as a full work day except for getting outside.

I have complete control of my own groceries here and I'm kind of disgusted by how healthy I'm eating. Pretty much the only bad indulgent thing I bought when I went to get groceries was freezies. And I haven't had any of them yet. But this is indulgent! 80% of my diet is fresh fruits and veggies. I've been having veggie and chicken wraps with guacamole and stuff... It's amazing and I've been able to avoid being sick nearly 100%. I feel free.

Looking forward to shooting my friends' wedding in two weeks.

I pictured you and me always
And in this photograph we're safe

  • Current Mood: impressed entirely content
  • Current Music: MuteMath
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