dancing music bean

My Life[house]

Desperate for changing, Starving for truth, closer to where I started chasing after you
I'm falling even more in love with you, letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move, I'm hanging by a moment here with you

Forgetting all I'm lacking, completely incomplete, I'll take your invitation, you take all of me

I'm living for the only thing I know, I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into just hanging by a moment here with you

There's nothing else to lose, there's nothing else to find,
There's nothing in the world that could change my mind

There is nothing else, there is nothing else

Edit: hipstamom, this answers one of your questions :D

Since the first time I heard this song in high school, this song has built itself into the fibers of my life. I think out of any song I have ever heard, Hanging By A Moment is one of very few that is truly my song. And every Lifehouse song that I have fallen in love with since hits me so close to home and helps me clarify exactly who I am, even when I am singing with a song that talks about feeling like you don't know yourself. So this post is going to be full of my life, in Lifehouse lyrics. Some of them I'll explain, and some will stand alone. Enjoy, and I encourage you all to find some Lifehouse CDs and try them out.

This is the only full lyrics post I'm going to make up, because I spent some time on it ahead of time. I wish I could do U2, Relient K, Switchfoot, and my other favourites, but during this 'thon, Lifehouse was at the very top. If I have some time I might do a few others.


The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time
And I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out

I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart that's still beating
In the pain is there is healing,
I n your name I find meaning
So I'm holding on, I'm barely holding on to you

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead...

Here we have another song that is so totally me, it just floors me when I listen to it. It describes me at this moment in my life as well as Hanging By A Moment did in High School. The poetry about the broken clocks and lights and stuff is totally who I am in a really morbid way, fascinated with living and dying because they're so co-dependent, going past the graveyard every morning on my way to work... And I'm damaged at best, but I'll never let go. And that last line is exactly it, story of my life, I tried to be guarded but I can't. In the pain there is healing! In His name, I find meaning, so I'm holding on.

I uploaded this one, here's the link so you can listen to it: http://www.sendspace.com/file/79old6

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
Because you're all I want, you're all I need
You're everything
Everything


If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine
If it had a home would it be my eyes?
Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this? Well here we go, now one more time...

I tried to climb your steps, I tried to chase you down
I tried to see how low I could get down to the ground
I tried to earn my way, I tried to change this mind
You better believe that I have tried to beat this

When will this end, it goes on and on
Over and over and over again
Keeps spinning around I know that it won't stop
'Till I step down from this for good

This song reminds me of so many attempted relationships, of so much of who I am and who my family is. This is the song I start listening to during midterms and hard times at school because the intensity and thoughts that go with it are so brilliant. And I know that it won't stop until I graduate. And life's turmoil won't stop until I die. *sigh*

I am falling into grace, to the unknown, to where you are
And Faith makes everybody scared

It's the unknown the don't-know
That keeps me hanging on and on and on to you

Faith makes everybody scared. It's a weird truth, that. And the unknown is a big part of faith.

Cause I remind myself of somebody else I'm
Feeling like I'm chasing like I'm facing myself alone
I've got somebody else's thoughts in my head
I want some of my own
Closer to finding out it doesn't mean anything

I love the fact that this song is called "Somebody Else's Song" because it reminds me that all the songs I love are somebody else's song, even if they are in some way truly mine.



Could you let down your hair be transparent for awhile
Just a little while, to see if you're human after all?
Honesty is a hard attribute to find when we all want to seem like we've got it all figured out
Well let me be the first to say that I don't have a clue
I don't have all the answers, ain't gonna pretend like I do



I guess you're the only one that nobody changes
Guess you're the only one left standing when everything else goes down
You're still the only one who will never change faces


This is exactly how I feel about my relationship with God. He's the only one that nobody changes, who never hides behind a mask.

You lost yourself
in your search to find
something else to hide behind
cause the fearful always preyed upon your confidence
Refuse to feel anything at all, refuse to slip, refuse to fall
Can't be weak, can't stand still, watch your back, 'cause no one will

This is what it's like to live in a family that has been victimized over and over again. This is the identity of the hurt, the slave, the forgotten.

And I am contemplating matters, all this cling and clatter in my head
And what you said is ringing, ringing faster, and it's all good
If you would stop the world from making sense
And if I could just realize it doesn't really matter

This is how I feel about life sometimes. I get tired of the clatter in my head... And sometimes things making sense is very unpleasant.

I'm finding my way back to sanity again, though I don't really know what I'm gonna do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight, spin around one more time and gracefully fall back to the arms of grace
Cause I am hanging on every word you say and even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me...

That first line is who I am right after finishing a really hard week at school...

Y ou can be right and I'll be real, Honesty won't be a pain that you'll have to feel
'Cause I don't need your approval to find my worth
I'm trapped inside of my own mind, afraid to open my eyes cause of what I'd find and I don't want to live like this anymore
There goes my pain, there goes my chains, did you see them falling?
Because this feeling has no meaning
There goes the world off of my shoulders
There goes the world off of my back

Does it scare you that I can be something different than you
Would it make you feel more comfortable if I wasn't?
You can't control me and you can't take away from me who I am

This is what school makes me feel. I remember listening to this song over and over after walking out of an Art History test. I don't need the approval of an institution to be worth something. They can be right, and I'll be real, and then my chains will fall.

Have you ever felt like your only comfort was your cage? You're not alone. I've felt the same as you.
Have you ever felt like your secrets give you away? You're not alone. I've been there too.
'Cause everyone is looking and everyone is laughing but I think everyone feels the same.

Your secrets giving you away, what a neat thought. I think this is so true, and inspires a lot of mercy in me.

Our common ground was broken long ago
What slipped through the cracks I fear we'll never know
I'll walk you through the graveyard of my mind
Show you a love that I buried alive
Because we both walked away
Who was wrong, who's to say I know
We both lit the match that burned the bridge
We both lit the match and watched our bridges burn down

This pretty much sums up a couple of friendships I've had and how they ended. Our common ground was broken long ago, a love that I buried alive.


All the leaves are turning and the sky fades to gray
Strange our life coincides with the seasons of today
Who's to say where the wind will blow...
And if the world should fall apart hold on to what you know
Take your chances, turn around and go
Maybe when the sun crashes through the gray
I can find the strength to make it through the day?

This song really speaks to me in February and March when school is getting harder...

I was young but I wasn't naive, I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
And still I have the pain I have to carry, a past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

After all this time I never thought we'd be here
When my love for you was blind, but I couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know, A part of me died when I let you go

This is my unhappy relationship song. It takes me back to unforgettable moments.

Stop tell me where you going
Maybe the one you love isn't there
You're going under
But you're over it all so you don't care

This is my song about wanting to offer advice to people who don't want to hear it...

Everything I know has let me down
So I will just let go, let you turn me inside out
Cause I know I'm not sure about anything
But You wouldn't have it any other way...

Spinning, Turning, Watching, Burning
All my life has found its meaning
Walking, Crawling, Climbing, Falling
All my life has found its meaning
You and I, I wouldn't change a thing


I know that I'll never be alone
you will never let me go
you are my anchor
hold my hand
while I'm sinking in the sand
no one else could understand
you are my anchor



Everything in the world was falling through, all I knew was to look to you
My sunshine
All my life never found my place, until I felt the sunlight on my face
My sunshine

Never meant to waste your time, never meant to fall out of line
I always tried  to get closer to you, now it seems with every step
Feels like I'm losing my breath, I don't know what else I can do

But you wash over me, you wash over me like rain
And you wash over me, you wash over me like sunshine
and you wash over me, You wash over me like rain
And you fall into me, you crawl into me
like sunshine


Patience can wait for now I think I've waited for too long
You always gave a choice, and the right to be wrong
All my life has been slipping through Your hands
I'm alive but I think it's time to live like I am
Am I ever gonna find it?
Am I ever gonna find out?



Did all these clouds around you break your fall as you came crashing to the ground?
Did you learn anything at all? You climb back up to come back down.
Everybody knows your name but they don't know who you are
But to them it's just the same, yeah you're just another name

She said fame will bring you down, at least that's what she used to say
Before they handed her the crown, she said it would never be this way

Yesterday she was a little girl pretending she was queen
Didn't know it'd change her world, didn't know what this would mean
Which mask will you wear today? How about the one with the pretty smile?
To you it's just another day in a life you haven't lived for quite a while


don't give up on me yet
don't forget who I am
I know I'm not there yet
but don't let me stay here alone

You're beautiful, You're confusing
You're illogical, You're amazing
And I've seen the world, it's overrated
Until you're everything
I have nothing but an empty space

Truer words. Beautiful emotions in these last few, and brilliant music.

 

 

Thanks Lewis!

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This is Twyla's post #36 in BLOGATHON 2007.
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Yay!~ You're doing great!

I get very emotional at this:

I cannot stand still, I can't be this unsturdy, this cannot be happening ... Somewhere in Between. Reminds me hard of a bad time in my life.